‘God, if you want me to be a priest…’

By Ivan Monge  

Ivan Monge is one of three seminarians for the Diocese of Tucson. Ivan is from St. Francis of Assisi Parish in Yuma. He enjoys watching ‘The Greatest Showman,’ reading science fiction, pick-up sports with friends, and playing his guitar. Ivan is beginning seminary formation with his propaedeutic year at Nazareth House in Phoenix. In his own words here is Ivan’s vocation story.  

My unique situation is that I am the first seminarian from the Diocese of Tucson to be going to the seminary that the Diocese of Phoenix is opening. I am doing my propaedeutic year at the Nazareth House in Phoenix, AZ. For being from a different diocese, they welcomed me with open arms and as one of their own. Being close to home for the first year is a real blessing.  

My calling started when I was 9 years old, as I was watching the priest raise the host during Mass. I just told myself, “I want to do that when I grow up!” 

I recorded myself in an old camcorder saying, “I’m going to be a priest when I grow up!” My mother said, “I’m going to keep this and show it to all your future girlfriends to scare them away!” I then proceeded to delete the video.  

The priesthood was always at the back of my mind while growing up. I’ve always been involved in the Church and with God. My mom would tell me stories before bed; she would read me the Bible and sing me psalms and worship songs. It was a great childhood. I became an altar server at around age 10 and did that until the age of 16.  

At 13, I was forced to attend the Arcoiris youth retreat, and I disliked it very much.  

However, the following year I served on the retreat! My mind changed completely though, because I was now seeing it through the eyes of a server, and I thought it was the most beautiful thing ever. I continued serving the youth/adult Arcoiris retreats until I left for the seminary. In the meantime, I also joined a few other ministries, such as choir at 17, young adult Arcoiris at 18, and Sanacion de Familia at 22. I had always wanted to be involved in the Church I just didn’t know how to go about it.  

It wasn’t until I was 21 that I felt the calling again, but I was just unsure if the priesthood was for me. I talked to my pastor and asked him how he discerned and what was a good way to find out if it was for me. He told me, “Pray. God will give you signs if it is meant for you.” I received signs at random times, even when I would be leading a retreat, strangers would come up to me and say, “Hey, aren’t you going to be a priest?” I had only told two people at the time: my pastor and my mom. I know that both of them would not tell anybody else. So, I got my signs from God through these strangers. Like most though, I denied it. I kept telling myself, “Nah, it’s just a coincidence.”  

I kept discerning and was supposed to go to discernment retreats, but that’s when Covid happened. Everything was put on hold and so was my vocation.  

I had been working a full-time government job since 2019 and, at the beginning, it was great. I had a big-boy job and made good money and got a few promotions. It wasn’t until my fourth year working there that I started to feel stuck, tired, and bored of life. I kept trying to do new things, but nothing was making me happy, nothing but the time I spent in the church. Priesthood stayed in the back of my mind as I kept working.  

It wasn’t until July 2023; I was about to turn 25. I was serving on a retreat, and I was at the chapel with my mom, and she asked me, “Hey, didn’t you want to be a priest? Are you still thinking about that route?” To which I replied, “Yeah, it’s still in my mind, but I don’t want to apply to the seminary with loans under my name.” (I had a $7,500 auto loan to pay off at the time). She said, “Why don’t you offer it to God? Leave it in his hands.”  

I took that into consideration, and I said, “God, if you want me to be a priest, pay off my car. You do this for me, and I’ll sign up to the seminary, no questions asked.” Once the retreat finished and a couple days passed, my dad got home from visiting my grandma. First thing he does is give me a handful of cash as he said, “Here, your grandma left some money so you can pay off your car or for whatever bills you have pending.” I was dumbfounded, flabbergasted! I looked at my mom, thinking she had told him, but I saw her facial expression. She, too, was shocked!  

I knew at the moment that God had a plan for me. I texted my pastor, “Sign me up for the seminary, I don’t have any more excuses.”  

I put in my two weeks’ notice, felt confident with the decision that I was making, and I applied. I filled all the paperwork and prerequisites in late July and August of this year. Then it was a waiting game. I had not heard any information for what felt like forever, even though it was only two weeks. They finally told me that I was in! That I would be going to Phoenix in just two days! I had nothing packed and nothing prepared, but at the same time, I had no worries. I spent the day buying clothes that I thought I would need. I packed my clothes and guitar and left everything else behind.  

I have had no regrets since September 1st, that was my first day of seminary and it has been a blessing. I do miss my family, friends, and communities, but I have no regrets. God set everything up to be as flawless as it could be for when it was my time to depart. 

That is my vocation story.